Saturday, November 12, 2011

Not alone

I used to think blogs were dumb. Who would want to read about other people's lives? Who cares? Over the past few months, though, I have undoubtedly changed my mind. I stumbled upon a few blogs here and there, most of them about running. It wasn't until my old high school coach mentioned "she was once a runner" that I began to see blogs as more than just people writing to space. Many of the blogs I follow are about people going through the same things as me. I am not alone in my trials and tribulations. Fancy that. On a serious note, though, being able to connect, even if it is just reading someone else's blog, has enabled me to speak up about many hidden battles I have restrained for too long. So now my story begins, at least in words on a page.

As I mentioned before the anonymous blog "she was once a runner" instigated my interest in reading other people's thoughts. I discovered the story about two months into the posting and had a field day reading the all the posts consecutively. Waiting like three days for the next post was agonizing, like waiting for a pair of new running shoes in the mail. The blog had a link to "training on empty" one day. I was hooked. I could relate to Lize Brittin, the author, in so many ways. (which I will discuss later) There was someone else out there dealing with the same stuff as me. I have since read every post on the blog. And there is a lot there. Through more links and such I found other writing by collegiate runners struggling with the same things as me. There is nothing like finding out you are not alone. Someone has been there before. Someone is one the same road as you, traveling back from wherever it leads, to tell you that you will survive, to tell you that you may face pain and warn you what not to do, and to say that sometimes the only way to get back on track is to go through Hell firsthand.  But those people are returning when they tell you that. They survived. So can you.

I find so much comfort in knowing that I am not the first to deal with this sequence of events I have faced. Though everyone's situation is unique, nothing is new. Am I healed? Gosh, no. I am I getting there? Slowly, but surely. It's a lifelong battle. But I will overcome it.

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